WHY I DON’T CARE IF MY CLIENTS SUCCEED

Ok, that might be a little aggressive, but it’s the truth.  When a new client comes to me with a specific goal of weight loss or improving their digestion or getting into the best shape of their lives – I am 100% with them.  I am there to support them and guide them, and I am right there with them to work through any issue they might be having.  I celebrate their wins with them and I encourage them to keep going when they’re feeling tired.  I push them to places I know they can go, even though they think they can’t.  I am completely and utterly invested in their success, and I will support them in any way I can to get them to where they want to go.  And yet, at the same time, I don’t care.

 

 

Someone asked me the other day if it’s difficult for me when clients don’t reach their goals.  Without hesitation, I said “No, not at all.”  Do I want them to succeed?  Of course!  But my ego is not tied up in whether or not he or she loses the weight or gets the ripped body he or she wants.  Whether or not my clients reach their goals has nothing to do with me.  Some clients are just not ready!

 

Over the years, working with many clients, I’ve come to accept that I can’t make anyone want to change.  I can only support, encourage, and facilitate their path to wellness, but it’s really up to the client to put in the work.  At the same time, I don’t take credit for any of my client’s successes.  I’ve only facilitated a path to get them there, but they are the ones who have to put in all the work.  They are the ones waking up early, showing up to their workouts, prepping their meals, and skipping the chemical-laden, sugar-filled foods at their work lunches.  I can’t do any of that for them.

 

Not every client is going to succeed with me, because not every client is ready to succeed.  But I will say, I’ve never had a client come to me who was ready who didn’t succeed.  I don’t say that to brag.  I say that because when someone is really ready to make a change, nothing will stand in their way.

 

 

On the other hand, when a client is not ready, I will still do everything in my power to get them to want to succeed.  A lot of what we do in health coaching sessions is we dig deeper.  I hold space for the client to explore why they aren’t making the changes, what they might be afraid of, uncovering where they might be unhappy in their lives, and what is standing in their way.  We dig deep until we get to the root of it.  It’s amazing what we can uncover – and once we uncover it, it can really shine light on what the client needs to do in order to move forward.  Those sessions are the most magical.  But then sometimes, even after all of that, the client still isn’t ready.

 

When a client is ready and excited and is putting in all of the work, it makes me excited and makes me want to support and encourage them even more.  It’s a domino effect.  But in order to initiate that domino effect, YOU have to be ready!  And with that, I leave you with this quote by Paulo Coelho:  “And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”

 

Thoughts?  Questions?  Comment below!  And if you’re interested in working with me, let’s set up a consultation!

 

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2 replies
  1. Melissa
    Melissa says:

    “I can only support, encourage, and facilitate their path to wellness, but it’s really up to the client to put in the work.” -So true! I’ve dealt with this as a Dietitian and it can be difficult to continue to see those who aren’t ready to make change. And as you say, it’s up to them to put in the work … it’s their life!

    Reply
    • Amanda Carneiro
      Amanda Carneiro says:

      Yes, Melissa! Absolutely! It’s a hard conversation to have with a client and it’s hard to let that client go – but It’s for the best! Just like any relationship – sometimes it’s just time to part ways. Thank you for reading!

      Reply

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